Junk Mail can make you Millions

This week, as normal I
received my regular volume of Junk Mail, ordinarily it ends up in
the trash can along with the chain letter style emails family and
friends seem to enthusiastically send out, I can only assume in fear
that the punch line of said emails will come true. For me however more
bad luck can only transform itself into good luck, plus the knowledge
that emails do not have any power over the universe and the fact that if
emails could render anybody rich and shameless just by forwarding
it to 10 people then we would receive them under the same pretence as we
do the  ‘Make Millions from Google‘ emails.

There seems to be a new resurgence
of emails relating to money that you don’t even have to do anything to
obtain this wealth, you just have to be you. I refer to the ‘inheritance‘,
email lottery’ or the ‘you’ve been selected‘ type emails.
Sometimes boredom gets in the way of common sense and the lack of
baseball induced excitement invariably increases the boredom I decided
to look at some of these emails.

‘Inheritance’

It seems that I, along with
all the other ‘undisclosed recipients’ have an Aunt or some other
relative, who believes I am the sole heir to her fortunes. It doesn’t
matter that I have older siblings, I am still the sole survivor of her
millions, and all I have to do is send my information to the attorney
listed to have the 340 million US dollars transferred to my bank
account.

So there you have it, I am
now rich and shameless and can purchase box seats behind home
plate for every game at home and away that the Phillies will play
in the 2010 season.

’email lottery’

It also seems that this week
my email address along with all those ‘undisclosed recipients’ have
won the ’email lottery’ in Australia and Europe. I won 2 email
lotteries that I didn’t enter, how cool is that, and all I have to do is
respond with my personal and banking information to collect the millions
of dollars in foreign currency, which after a quick conversion would
give me another 680 million US dollars

What more could I ask for, I
am more than just ‘rich and shameless’ I am now a billionaire and
all I have done is open 3 emails.

‘you’ve been selected’

How much more money could I
make this week, it seems quite a bit actually because my email address
is very popular. I received from 4 different people telling that I
personally, along with all the other ‘undisclosed recipients’
were people of good nature and would be able to benefit from the 137
million US dollars stuck in an account in Nigeria, and that the person
controlling that account needs my help and I can get to keep 10% of the
funds, if I just give them my personal information and banking details.

I figured 10% of 137 million
US dollars, is peanuts compared to the billion or so I already had, but
greed being the ultimate evil I wanted everything, so I added the 4 lots
of 14 million US dollars to my total income this week.

Of course on top of all this
money I could have also made millions from Google.

What amazes me about the
stupidity of the people that send these emails is they believe that
people are stupid enough to respond to them.

1 – The email addresses they
send them from in no way reflect the content of the email as most come
from the new spam email service supplied by ‘gmail’. I know a lot
of normal people use ‘gmail‘ accounts, but eventually ‘gmail
will get the same bad name as ‘msn‘, ‘hotmail’, ‘yahoo
and ‘aol‘. Although all but ‘aol‘ has managed a recovery
from there email servers being branded as spam accounts by many.

2- The IP addresses of the
mail servers which send these emails is not even close to the location
they claim to be sending them from and most times is being used as a
mirror server.

3- The return email address
can never be found as it is cancelled moments after the mass email is
sent out.

4 – If you are going to
personalize an email and hope someone takes the bait, DON’T
send it to ‘undisclosed recipients’

To all those people that
have being irresponsible and fallen for one of these types of emails,
you really shouldn’t be allowed to have an email address, and to all
those people that find it a requirement to harass us with these spam
emails, do me a favor and TAKE MY EMAIL ADDRESS OFF YOUR F*CKING LIST

Back to baseball – It seems Brad
Lidge
wants us to feel sorry for him because he may have an
injury which he didn’t disclose, he felt it was better to blow a save in
the World Series than go on the DL. Well Brad, now you have to put up
2008 type numbers in 2010 for any normal person to take you seriously
again….

Finally bye bye Brett
Myers….

If you stuck around long
enough to read this babbling piece of crap then your as bored as me
without baseball….

GO EAGLES….for now


14 Comments on “Junk Mail can make you Millions”

  1. phillies_phollowers says:

    Luckily, there is football today…but then it is 5 or 6 days of boredom again…14 weeks of this to go…ugh.
    And yes, Lidge should be smacked!

    Jenn
    http://philliesphollowers.mlblogs.com/

  2. redstatebluestate says:

    You mean those emails aren’t legit? GODDAMN IT! I just went on a spending spree after inheriting 38 million pounds sterling from Barrister Jack McCowlick in Birminghamshire! Way to rain on my parade, Peter. Thanks a lot.
    –Jeff
    http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/
    http://mtrredstatebluestate.com

  3. devilabrit says:

    Jenn – smacked…more like minor leagued till he proves himself again
    Jeff – But look at the fun you had spending…see there is a brightside to everything
    ~peter

  4. southernbelle says:

    Peter: First of all, I’d like to congradulate your Phillies. They played hard, and it was definitely not easy for my Yanks.
    Now it’s the offseason…..nothing to do, nothing to blog about….maybe I’ll go through my emails too.
    -Virginia
    http://southernbelle.mlblogs.com

  5. carolmwl says:

    All the scam-sters need to find is one naive, gullible person. Unfortunately…they’re out there.

    And YES, I’m mourning the loss of the 2009 season, too – tho I AM looking forward to the Eagles whooping the Cowboys tonight. That is always a fine moment. Remember Garcias’ Merry Christmas, Philadelphia? =) Nice.

    carol
    http://www.howboutthosephils.mlblogs.com

  6. devilabrit says:

    Virginia – the off season does pose a problem of what to do for everyone.. just be careful of those emails…
    Carol – Whooping the Cowboys could be seen as a consolation, although that was probably the whooping of the Giants last week… not as much fun to trash the Cowboys with no TO in their line-up..
    ~peter

  7. xcicix says:

    You don’t get “Buy Viagra now”? Because that’s all the spam I get, along with stuff from Karen Scharff, Citizen A. Why do you open them?
    The eagles are awesome. They have a partnership with Tastykake! Can you buy krimpets at Eagles games?

  8. diamonddiva says:

    I must be very popular in Nigeria, because I get those emails all the time. Maybe they feel sorry because my two home teams are the Nationals and the Redskins……..
    Shelley http://diamonddiva.mlblogs.com/

  9. devilabrit says:

    xcicix – I blocked viagra from my mail server along time ago so they just get returned to sender automatically… Why Do I Open Them?… no one I know sends me emails, so I figured If I read them then it’s like having a friend…LMAO…
    Shelley – There is probably a mountain of reasons you get the Nigeria emails…feeling sorry for you is probably not one of them…:-) at least the Redskins aren’t the Browns…there’s the brightside of supporting Washington teams…

    ~peter

  10. rrrt says:

    Well, I guess the MSN mail filters are doing their job, because I thankfully don’t get these emails. Darn, I could be missing out on millions! đŸ™‚
    Unfortunately, the Eagles sucked last night.
    Sue
    Rants, Raves, and Random Thoughts

  11. mlbmark says:

    Way to be a Click Magnet. Good line.

    Thanks for the input and all your commenters are invited to do the same over on the community MLBlog.

    Mark/MLB
    http://mlblogs.mlblogs.com
    http://twitter.com/MLB

  12. redstatebluestate says:

    Dude, “Click Magnet” was a good line. I saw that. You got MARK to COMMENT on YOUR BLOG! You WON THE LOTTERY DUDE! It’s not spam. It’s REAL!
    –Jeff
    http://redstatebluestate.mlblogs.com/
    http://mtrredstatebluestate.com

  13. ibleedpinstripes says:

    “What amazes me about the stupidity of the people that send these emails is they believe that people are stupid enough to respond to them.”
    – How much of that fake money would you wanna bet that people actually DO respond to those emails? LOL. My solution? *clicks ‘Report Spam’ and closes window* =)

    – Lisa
    http://perennialpinstriper.mlblogs.com/

  14. mattpeas says:

    if i was a Phils fan i wouldnt be a big fan of Lidge right now, well im sure you really werent all season. hes just being cocky and looking for excuses for his poor performances

    http://pittpeas.mlblogs.com


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